Pebbles...

Today ..its now 630 pm. I will be leaving Stuttgart in almost 12 hrs . The party is done , gifts exchanged ..all formalities carried out ...and now I am in my office just whiling away time. How do I feel leaving a place that was my workplace for 6 monthes? How do I feel leaving the group of my freinds and collegues in Office? How do I feel walking out of this office and knowing that perhaps this is the last time I will see these guys in years if not decades? I feel sad and somewat empty . And there is an awkward silence in the office . Adding to that mood is the overcast day , the usual busy hum drum at the office and the fact that I will not come to office tomorrow. Will I miss Germany? Most likely not. Will I miss my collegues ..most likely. Will they miss me ? I dont know. Most likely too is the fact that on reachin India ,I will be so caught up that the memories of germany will fade away soon. Maybe for the first few days I will wake up in the morning surprised that I am not in hos...

There is a small forest near the University in Stuttgart and sometimes I go for a run around the lake at its centre. It is a beautiful track and well kept. The last time I went for a run I saw a lot of leech like creatures crawling on the forest floor at regular intervals. They are called slugs and although generally veeeeeryyyy slloooooww in movement they do try to move around. Even attempting to cross the forest paths in one sloooowww loooonnnggg trek. I generally try my best to avoid stepping over them even though it means jumping half of the way. Frankly speaking I find their struggle to cross the forest path heroic. With their slow gait..this must feel like a marathon for them . But still they attempt it for food/sex/adventure..and I respect guys who attepmt heroic things so..kind of salute them as I jump over them. ;) Anyway , they have got some company in slow mo world in terms of snails. Now poor snails are not that great to look at but I always imagine them as school kids with...

I am a pretty argumentative guy. I relish a good brainshaking argument. I like my ideas shaken , stirred..turned on my head . I like being given a perspective I missed out. I am an "argument for arguments sake" guy. I like to taste a sentence...In the sense that I like rolling it and looking at it from different sides. While I am lucky I have met a few guys who do not take arguments too personally ..I have been pissed off by a few "types" . I will try defining them 1. "I am important" Guys. These guys have had a mediocore life and have hit a jackpot once which is the defining moment . So they play it around with such aplomb that suddenly their argument becomes too personal. If you attack the logic they get sentimental. 2. "The Righteous" . The second variety are the "ethical" paper tigers. Their base logic is that the world is governed by the ethical code of conduct. So if its not "right" its obviously not true. They re most o...

A few days ago I asked some one I knew.."who do u think is the most beautiful woman ever to represent female sexuality on bollywood " ...The answer was a certain "Madhubala". I beg to disagree. I was very specific in my question "female sexuality" . No I did not mean skin show(although frankly ..its someones skin ..and I do not see the problem in showing any skin,if its beautiful that is..). Anyway what I meant was a woman who filled the screen with "feminine presence " when she used to be there. A presence which was tangible and sensual even while fleeting and momentary. A woman whose "womanness" was so beautiful that it made you fall in love with not only her but with the beauty of idea of a woman. An idea that is strong,and soft alternating in its feel to drive you to a level of conciousness where you feel the alternating void and fullness of pure and unadulterated happiness. A woman who was ,as all great things are, was more than ...

I was reading a book on Cellular automata and somehow I think we behave acording to one as we move in time. As most of u know cellular automata is a matrix that has a space dependent variance as it proceeds in time. Which simply means its a matrix that changes based on last condition. Something like Markov Processes. Which is again like a drunk man...he only remembers the fact that last time he was in a bar. ..rest all memory ..wife kids etc are irrelevent in his hunt for the next bar. The only relevant thing is the last memory that the last bar had closed down. Lets think of our controllable variables in life..(Partially controllable) C1,C2... Lets think of Weakly controllable variables like our siblings, spouses etc WC1,WC2... And lets say non controllable variables NC1,NC2... Then there are varuables we do not know the property of..like say..a kid on the road..can u control him? if yes in wat way does he affect ur actions.. So name them and Unknown,, UC1,UC2.. Now at the time u are...

Yesterday I saw a movie ..a german one called "The wave". It was a movie suggested by a german guy working with me in the office . The recommendation was prompted by a discussion we had in the cofee room about Hitler. The german guy is a big fan of Gandhi and wanted to know how Indians look to him. I told him that we revere him as a guy who led a billion guys to freedom. I also told him that while we had differences in the personal life of bapu..I as a person look up to him .I told him about Subhas chandra Bose and how he had used the POWs in the WW2 to fight aginst the British, and had some sort of pact with the japanese and Germans too ..but Gandhi was against Hitler and somehow ethically he convinced Indians that the British may be bad but this was worse. Surprsisingly he seemed to agree and was full of admiration for the ethics led freedom struggle. The conversation then turned to Hitler. He said something very interesting. The crux of the matter was that he did not think...

There are two things that have happened since I came to Germany ...One I have watched youtube too much and I have been to Rome. Two disconnected things that some how fell together when I was on the Plane back from Rome. An introduction is due. The youtube videos I had been lapping up were the religious ones ..sometimes pleading..sometimes threatening and sometimes outright funny. Infact I have always benn amused by such religious videos. I can spend hours infront of Quran TV or Sanskar TV ....because nothing amuses me more than religion. I am highly entertained by serious people getting so damn serious about something so hillarious. Anyway how does this relate to Rome? After all Rome is home of Vatican...the seat of the Church. I will come to that , but first a short history of Roman empire. Roman empire was the glory of Europe for 1000 years...shortly it rose for 5oo yrs..peaked for 200 and fell gradually for 300 years... ! All this from 500 BC to 500 AD. Big deal! Quite a big deal ...