Dont close the window !!

Dont close the window!!
Dont close the window !!

This is a photo i edited with Lightroom (adobe). 

Fickle

Fickle is the god of love..
Fickle is the wind of pain..
Fickle is the joy of hope..
Fickle is the triumph of gain

Fickle is the sway of loyality
Fickle is the rule of royality
Fickle is the spear that hits
Fickle is the heart that beats



Fickle is the brood that bears
fickle is the shroud that tears
Fickle is the kiss thats sweet
Fickle is the furnace of heat..

Fickle is the human nature..
Fickle is the best of stature..
Fickleness the truth itself
Fickle is the other and self !!

Dangerous Books

There are a few books that I feel I should have never picked up in my life. My life was much simpler ,nicer and straighter before I laid my hands on these books. It was like a life without cigarretes, booze or drugs. These books are the ones I completely blame for screwing with my mind in a way cigarettes or booze or drugs do with your pleasure centre. And like all bad habits that people pick up..these books hit me in my early teens and some how they like all bad habits have never died down. I will list down thse books so that everyone else can avoid them like plague and never face the dilema or issues I do. I am the best guy to tell you that...because its like a drug addict telling some innocent bystander about ill effects. Somehow I think it will make life better for the world

The Fountain head- By Ayn Rand
Atlas Shrugged- Ayn Rand
We the living- Ayn Rand

Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance- Robert Pirsig

Catch 22 - Joseph Heller

The picture of Dorian Gray- Oscar Wilde

and last but not the least

Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger

Me Nathuram Godse Boltoi- Nathuram Godse

Please listen to me and keep away. Especially from impressionable teenagers.

Al Vizag

If the CBI /FBI/CBI would take me a bit seriously I could reveal a very big secret. A secret so big that would make skeletons in cupboards tumble out like the aloo does in a paper thin dosa(OK , not a great simile..but too many dosas does play around in my head). Since no one here is listening , there is a place brimming with natural suicide bombers in india itself that just might be the place of prime recruitment for the Al Qaida. A place so naturally suicidal that it would make those sissy afgans squirm in their Pathanis (or watever). Its called AL-VIZAG.
I was introduced to these suicide bombers like many new entrants to this madhouse..on roads. I was taking an innocent lil ride to the town when it happened.In a highway filled with heavy trucks and swarming with public busses, a lone figure of a young cyclist descended from the dark(streets in AL-VIZAG are dimly lighted ..as they serve the dual purpose of training and transport tracks)..and proceded to cross the road in a diagonal (never heard of poor ol Pythogoras..) all the while talking on the Cell phone and all the while looking on the wrong side. With the trucks zippin past this lone ranger..It was a sight that almost made me search for the second seat belt. But hey ..this lone ranger had further aces up his sleeve. He proceeded to "overtake" a truck ..yeah u heard right. Overtake a truck...!! And wait , all this overtaking business from the left side of the truck. My my ..Osama would have been proud of this young man's desire to follow the "tao of dying for dying sake"..! And all this while still continuing on his cell phone. While the brave attempt continued..like all good victims I steered my car clear of this strenous "training session".
As I entered town , I was thinking that this must be the bloodlust of the single black(well he WAS black) male..but lo behold I was to be jolted out of my reverie.
Uncl e(without helmet) garu on a scooter with two kids infront , a hippopotamus at the pillon and a thin girl behind the hippo(most likely hippo's sister) , entered the crossroad from right , merrily chatting on his cellphone with one hand while manouvering his machine with the other. Multitasking at Sucide bombing?
At the traffic light I stopped to take a break ...while a scooter with similar hippos stopped by near my car..and then suddenly out of nowhre the scooter along with its occupants just collapsed on my car. Yes,I swear I am not making it up(I have insurance papers to prove it). I was so shell shocked at the happenings till now at Al-Vizag that I couldnt react at all.
I mumbled "I am sorry.I was here" to the embarrsed Uncle and promptly wrote my secret report to the CBI..titled "Al -Vijag-The suicide bombers haven"

Equillibrium

The most dangerous quality of a structure is equilibrium. A structure which has equillibrium does not strive to either get better or worse. It just stays and by the very virtue of its "staying" it does not change. Which means the follies get crystalised as do the goodies. But the only factor ie crystallization itself multiplies the follies and degrades the quality of courage . Because courage requires the ability to change ..and equilibrium by its very nature abhors change .

The only problem with equillibrium is that in any form..over a long time..equillibrium is self destructive. Strangly , equillibrium, stiffles creative thinking and cuts the losses. However one must realise that equilibrium would have been nice and lovely if all around there would be equillibrium. And thats not so .

The world around cannot be in equillibrium,there are small offsets going off which somehow introduce an imbalance that moves it forward(its a bit like walking..you move forward because you introduce an imbalance )...And getting stuck in an equillibrium bubble with a changing world around it is a very very dangerous situation.

Its like a bullock cart stuck on a freeway ;). Its in equilibrium (Its stuck) but it carries a very high chance of getting hit

Quality of Anger.

Anger by its very nature is illogical. People get angry because something appeals to it other than logic. Its something that they do not understand or its something that triggers a primal instinct to fight. Extreme emotions ,extreme love, extreme hurt, extreme feeling of betrayal or even an extreme form of happiness sets off anger. Anger is neither good or bad. Its neither harmful nor useful. The actions resulting from the anger results in destructiveness or constructivity. Without emanating actions , anger is like a detonator without the explosive. The quality of explosive determines the quality of explosion , rather than that of the detonator.

Trying to justify anger is like justifying hunger or sleep. There is no justification . It happens precisely because there IS no justification,no logic or background casuality. Trying to control anger is not possible . If its possible its just that you are not angry enough yet,or maybe your threshold of breakdown hasnt come yet. Neither is "chanellising" anger possible. Actions arising from anger may be put in a certain format to define "good" or "bad". It is important that we try not to "understand" or "label" anger. Like most emotions , love, hatred or pain..anger will defy logic or explanations. Any explanations would lead to a lot of wild goose chases which will confuse ordinary human beings and lead to tangential thoughtlines.

Qualities of a nation

If I had to look at a degrading rotting civillation what would I look for? What would

characterise the the deepest qualities of a civilastion which has run out of fuel? Its a

very tricky question and maybe I cant put it into a few paragraphs ..But yes one can touch

upon a few "lackings" that would somehow color a nation/civilisation on a downward spiral:-

1. Lack of acceptance of reality- No civilation is perfect. It evolves . It changes its

shape . The differing points between civilastions is the reason it evolves. A vibrant

civilisation is capable of separation of cash from trash. It somehow has the uncanny ability to filter out the rhetoric from logic and practically select the most viable alternative.The most viable alternative is not the most pretty nor is the most "logical"..Its simply the alternative that gets the work done in the most efficient manner. The nations/civilizations which dither at this point of choice miss the bus over and over again till they degrade to the level where their choices are externally imposed. The only cure that the rotting civilisation can administer is huge doses of delusion and denial .

2. Lack of a strong feminine/matriarchial culture- While I am no fan of women's lib movement(they tend to go overboard , as do women) , the lack of strong women reflects the weakness of a civilisation as no other social aspect. Women are better equipped, more intelligent , multifaceted and probably effect more people that men .But the paradoxical part of the story is that they are the most vulnerable also. They as a group are like a

inner radiating core who must be protected and placed in a postion where they can weild power. While a man can influence his peers and maybe immediate relatives, women's influence extends to generations . A nation which some how pulps its women into submission is in turn creating spineless mothers , mothers who somehow give rise to a generation of spineless creatures which turn on the most vulnerable section..women. Its a negative feedback loop that feeds itself till that nation reaches the nadir of exploitation and subjugation.

3. Lack of respect - Respect is a universal characteristic that somehow percolates down from the organisational to individual levels. A nation/civilisation which is on dying threos seems to suffer from the total lack of respect. Respect in all its forms, self-respect, respect for space, respect for views, respect for ability , respect for merit...! And somehow while this lack of respect is disguised in terms of "freindliness" or some other politically correct word...it eats into every individual till he just becomes a passive player . The down side of lack of respect is the death of the group which holds to respect..and rise of groups which just dont have it. Gradually the reins of the nation pass onto the latter due to either majority or just simply the lack of desire by the former.

4. Lack of moral high ground- Morality seems like a haloed shell which pops out only in literary writings. However the Morality I am refering to is simply the Zeitgiest of the society prevalant at any point of time. This morality is the morality that is practiced. While it may not be perfect , it is fashioned by the times and generally dictates the opinions and taboos of the society. Lack of a moral high ground by the society (the morality may be flawed..but it should exist) seems to be a critical factor in "good" and "bad" nations.

5. Lack of quality- Quality like respect is an omnipresent aspect which really cant be put down into a few words. And like respect , quality doesnt offer immediate gratification.However the lack of pursuit of quality defines the strategic rise and fall of nations and civilisations. A well made product is not well made only because of market considerations. ..Its well made because the person making it is in persuit of something beautiful. This pursuit is not practical..Its something that is inherent and nurtured by society. This lack of quality and its nurture by society effects not only material products but also thoughts and practices . Loss of quality actually breaks down the core of society ,ie family . And yes no amount of hugging, kissing and jewelery makes up for this lack of quality. A total lack about understanding quality and its desire seem to be the fulcrum of a rotting nation.

6. Kill the messenger - Last but (oh so cliched) least , the greatest and the most lamentable quality of such a nation is the zest to kill the messenger for the message. This singular folly cuts the very feedback required for constantly evolving and improvising a nation.

A nation/civilisation is decided by the will of its majority(even in an authoratrian setup). The majority decide its character and being. A few good men /women cant lift out the majority unless the majority is willing to be "lifted up". I guess this willingness and its presence will decide weather a nation thrives or continues its dismal presence.

PS: I have used the words "nation" and "civilizations " in the same breath but they are in fact totally differing concepts. However in the context of the article they are interchangeable .:)

The Story of the holy Cow....

Once upon a time there was a small village in one of the godforsaken corners of the country ..Poor and dilapidated. There were no rains ..no crops and the neighbouring villages had often looted this village thrice (lets name the village ..mm..Indunagar)...

They all sat down and thought over it and finally the panch decided that it was only because that they did not have enough cows that they are facing all these problems.
So they formed a board of villagers held a selection interview for the best cows around the village. Now they promised that whichever cow is selected will have the honour of village on his shoulders. (errr..her shoulders). She would be crwoned with the best thorns and paraded with the best bells. She will get the right of the way in the village streets and not only that she will get her own platoon of cows to command .
This was a lucrative offer for all cows in the vicinity of the village . All the cows who were struggling with their masters , or were too young and full of josh. All left their jobs and jumped into the selection board.
After days of tough tests the board selected the best cow and her platoon of cows . They named the best cow "holy cow" and awarded her with all they had promised.
For first few weeks the "holy Cow" was the talk and the awe of the village. Everytime the neighbours tried anything funny the "holy cow " would be there with her platoon. Soon her fear and awe spread around the villages and no one dared touch Indupur.
Thus "holy cow " had actually nothing to do rather than train her commandoes. Seeing this the buffaloes of the village got jealous. More so when they had to toil every day at the field and also give milk ..without so much as being given half the glory of the holy cow.
So they approached the Sarpanch and logically told him that the need for the "holy Cow" was over. The present Sarpanch was son of the previous one and had been born in a secure and prosperous village unlike his father..! And the buffaloes logic was unbeatable.
While all this was goin on "Holy Cow" came to kno of all this scheeming. However so drunk it was with her glory that she laughed at the antics of the buffaloes.
She was confidant that no one could touch her..after all she was a "holy Cow". Her commandoes prodded her , the goats tried to make her see some reason....But everytime she would wave them off by shaking her golden bell.
Gradually ..the sarpanch started withdrawing her privilages ....First it was the right to choiciest grass, then it was her right of the way, then her commandoes were insulted ...
With all this happening , the "Holy Cow" refused to look . Everytime she would relax with her grass and a bottle of mineral water and shake her golden bell and say.."I am a holy Cow"!!
All this time the buffaloes were united and were meaner than before..

One day as the Holy Cow was elaborating her exploits of fightin the enemy in her times..the news came came that the "Holy Cow" has been ordered by the Village Work Commission that it had to give Milk like ordinary Cows to survive.
Hearing this she fell off her hay chair and reality struck her..but it was too late.

Soon she and all her Comando Cows were herded into stables and milked for all they were worth.To rub insult into injury the supervisors were the buffaloes. But now it was too late..
The villagers milked the "holy Cow" for all she was worth till she became frail and weak like the rest of the cows ...Her commamdoes also lost all their training and got involved into petty tactics...

One fine spring morning the neighbours attacked the village. The sarpanch did what was told to him by his father.He called on the Holy Cow. But now that the daily milking was on the Holy Cow had lost weight and strength.
Still the Holy Cow mustered her courage got her group united and went to face the arme at the gates of the village..

History tells us that the village was looted thoroughly this time by her neighbours houses burnt and people killed ..History also tells us that till the final wee hours of that eventfull morning ..an old shrivelled Cow and her band of rag tag cows held the enemy at the gates till their last drop of blood...!!

My right..my left

My right to live and die..My right to laugh and cry..

My right to go leave .My right to stay

My right to solitude..My right to attitude..

My right to water..my right to food..

My right to be sad ..My right to be bad..

My right to be mature..my right to be a lad..

My right to love..my right to hate..

My right to wake up early ..My right to stay late..

My right to write..My right to fight..

My right to blindness ..My right to sight..

My right to live and die..My right to laugh and cry..

My right to go leave .My right to stay

Hapiness /Sadness - a nobler emotion?

"raahi manwa dukh ki chinta kyun sataati hai..dukh to apna saathi hai..

sukh hai chaon dhalti aati hai jaati hai..dukh to apna saathi hai "

I have almost got used to starting every conversation with the disclaimer that "this is my personal opinion and I have a gut feeling that you might diagree..but hear me out "..So I will use the same disclaimer in this piece .

The genesis of this thought is something illogical and totally whimsical like /love on my part for old hindi songs. That would not have been as funny if it was not for the fact that most of the songs I like are the so called "sad songs" of Rafi.

Now ,once as I was humming a particuarly tragic song ...one of my freinds interefered with my line of intoxication and butted in"these sad songs depress you..You should listen to happy songs..hapiness is much nobler feeling than sadness"!!

All the three canons of her(sad songs make you depressed, you should listen to happy songs, hapiness is a nobler feeling than sadness) seemed so wrong to me that I at once dismissed her as a lunatic and continued with my musical pursuit.

But long after that I thought over the last canon.."hapiness is a much nobler thought than sadness"..

I really didnt know wat to make of it. Is it so ? I mean what do you mean by a "nobler" thought? Does noble signify purity? depth? genuiness? beauty ? truth? emotion? ...

If weighed on these terms ..in what way does sadness fall behind hapiness as a nobler thought? Even in the case of "inspiring" works of art,mechanics , pure science ..sadness and tragedy seems to score much higher than hapiness! So why is it that we dismiss sadness as a "less nobler" emotion than "hapiness"?

Infact I would go a step further and classify hapiness as a kind of dumbing down drug compared to sadness as a cup of refreshing cofee. Sadness goes deeper, tears you bloodier and somehow shakes you more ! It wakes you up from stupor and somehow touches the basest of your feelings. Sadness makes you realise that deep within you there exists a different and a a powerful personality.

I would dare hapiness to do the same. Except for a dose of euphoria that neither lasts nor does something worthwhile ..it does generate nothing. In a way its overrated . The way sugar is overrated. The way butter is overrated.

I am not saying that there should be any absence of hapiness in our life .but lets not give it the credit for something it doesnt deserve..just because it looks good and smells fresher.

Lets look beyond the skin of an emotion before we decide its nobility.

Weekend Requiem

Its sunday night and I dont want it to end..

The saturday is over and so is the sunday..

Its all clear today ..but I dont want it end..

I dont want to see the monday sun..

I dont want the zombie run..

I dont want the ride to office..

I dont want the formal slide..

I want this night to stretch to eternity..

I want want this night never to end..

I just dont want a piece of action..

I want all of the weekend ..

Its sunday night and I dont want it to end..

The days perhaps will..perhaps this night..

Perhaps some days weekends will be weekdays ..

Perhaps time will bend ..

And those days will be the happiest of my life..

Till then leave me ,my friends ..

To cry over a spent week..

To cry over a happy weekend..

each to his own

Each to his own...

Each to what he owns..

Each to the dead of the night ..

Each to the centre of the right..

Each to his happiness

Each to his tears..

Each to the sunshine he touches..

Each to his fears..

Each to the loneliness of his dreams..

Each to the pain of his screams....

Each to the path he snakes..

Each to the dead he rakes...

Each to the bloody heart he breaks

Each to the dagger he takes

Each to his silence and pain..

Each to the music of the slain..

Each to his own tragedies..

Each to the moment he dies..

Each to his music ..

Each to his logic..

Each to end of the road..

Each to the highway broad..

Each to his life and death

Each to the beauty on earth..

Each to the ugliness within..

Each to his piety and sin..

Why i hate Abhishek Bachhan!

While I have never been a fan of the "metrosexual men" genre of films..especially bollywood variety..there is one particular "metrosexual gentleman" who I am pretty vitriolic about. Mr Abhishek Bacchan.

And the hate that I feel for him goes beyond the fact that he is married to the plastic smile gal . It goes beyond his bad acting.his stupid "romantic" antics..his goody goody image and his awesomely badly executed "cuteness"(if you are cute at 40 ..then either u have a hormonal imbalance or serious sexuality issues).

The real reason for my true hatred stems from a multiple set of reasons..

First- He is the epitome of the fact that instead of "aap" its the "baap" factor which actually works at ground level India. That he is the son of big b is not so much an issue as the fact that he has no other claim to fame than that. His entire existance revolves around his dad which I feel is more of dependence than standing up to his own personality. Its not love..its oppurtunism at its cushiest.

Second- Dead factor. This is one of the few guys who cant say an original thought or original issue despite having access to the best of upbringing. He just cant react to a situation . His lines are cliches ..somewat like those valentine day cards which get burnt by Shiv Sena. How long can you get off by saying "I respect his work".."Awesome..that was awesome"? C'mon wake up and use some other reading than the archies cards.

Third- Fakeness. I am yet to see another dumbass fake as this guy is. He is humble to a fault. Well buddy ..humilty is respected when the person has done sumthing and THEN is humble about it. What exactly mind boggling things have you done to be so "humble" about. It suits you as much as "subtle" suits Rakhi Sawant(THAT gal deserves some respect ..not you, dumbass). Unless you think that as the fastest sperm you have achieved the Mount Everest of conquest.

Fourth- Joru ka ghulam. Does this guy have any shame ? I mean its ok to respect your wife but when will you learn to respect yourself. Your wife drags you to cannes and you are there to "support" her? Bloody hell , why dint u just CAN yourself? I mean is your only means of publicity is being a good husband? If you had a cent of sense you would have died to make your wife be proud of your deeds for a change. Gawd ..u are such a shame to the entire "mankind".

I could go on..and on.This guy bugs me such a lot..! But no they (his coterie) just refuse to kill him. He makes his debutant entrance every friday with the best of directors and then kills their careers. He mumbles thru roles which ppl could have made legends(have a look at Vikram's role in the southie version of Ravan)...and then he smiles and gets "oh so humble"? Oh you dyslexic , moron ..what are you humble about? Humble about being a deadweight and a prime example of nepotism ?

Get a life man...Sucking will get you so far ! And when papa bachan retires from life? Whom will you suck up to..?

Dum maro dum?

Compromise

As always the seed for this thought arises from many "well meaning" suggestions regarding my marriage. One of my juniors(actually elder by age ..and yes happily married) said to me "sir, I have seen that u dont compromise..thats so detrimental to u finding a bride..u have to compromise in marriage".

Fine. Cool.Point taken.

So before a decision is taken I have to be in compromise mode ?

The issue got me thinking about this almost pathological mode of "compromise" we Indians live in. Yes ..we are always ready for "compromise"! We are always ready with our "truce proposals". And the best part is that we are never demanding and we feel happy about it. We feel so proud of this ability that we flaunt it to the world.

The flip side is that we never demand wat we want..we demand a compromise. And we do get results as expected.

We never demand good quality roads..we demand a compromise with potholes. We never demand a good quality governance..we get a coalition hotch potch. We dont demand quality food and hence we get un-hygenic dish dash..

The saddest part is that when it comes to ourselves we too demand nothing . We ask for a compromise. With the disastrous results that we are half baked individuals. We do not know weather to be an excellent brother, father, husband or individual. We end up being a pot pourri of confused emotions and disastrous priorities.

The ironic part is that demanding quality and getting quality is so much reachable. We have just havent had the enuf guts to try it. Yes there will be a fight at the start and its that fight that we are taught to avoid. We have lost the guts to fight for something we trust will give quality.

I have had many an opportunities where I did try in my small way to try out this theory of mine . and it has wrked out fine...and i was surprised by the ease with which it happened.

Just to mention one small incident.

Getting a four wheeler driving license is considered a compromise with morals to pay a bribe in many parts of India. And this was the first part of the issue. I had no four wheeler driving license and I tried getting one in Kerala. (of all places !!). So I thought..lets try to take the straight way .

I went to the RT office and gave the test in front of a computer..passed. Paid the required 150 rupees..as fees. Learnt driving and gave it the legitimate way. Passed. Got my DL.

oops!!

where was the compromise that we are talking of..?

Why are we ready for a compromise when there isnt actually any need for one?

Our education system is another. We compromise with bad teaching because we never demand quality. IIT was an eye opener in this regards.

The teachers were on average good but then the students were so used to compromise that they didnt prod them . But ask the right questions and the teachers were a revealation. They would respond with equal fervour . And in case of bad teaching there is always youtube and wikipedia to refer..! So why dont you demand quality teaching? why do u compromise before even testing the waters?

I love trekking and mountaineering. And I was told that "yaar..aaj kal time nahin milta"..Frankly I have had no issue with time as far as my hobbies are concerned. I have almost trekked , cycled , rafted every year of my life.

"yaar..aaj kal log acche nahin hain.."..I had no issues with them at all. Infact despite a few pit falls almost all of my closest freinds..classmates, IIT guys, relations ,freinds have been awesome people. Where are the trecherous people I had heard of?

Yes , I have had to remove unwanted priorities..Yes I have had to be straight and cut out frills , yes, I had to avoid a few people and yes I had to let go a few things . But in the end I have ended with quality people, time and material things. Its possible .

Why do we decide on giving up and living with compromises when there is absolutely no need?

Any explanations?

....

1. Silence
2. Hello..hows the sandwich?
3. Smile
4. Do u think there will be a problem with generation gap?

5. Everything is there in my biodata!
6. Do u do yoga?
7. What are your expectations?
8. are you ok with this?
9. You must be having a lot of girlfreinds.
10. You look adventurous.
11. Kingfisher dress isnt bad !
12. Smirk.
13. Ok , so , hello
14. Smile
15. I can take care of it all
16. Angry look
17. I am not selfish
18. I want to work
19. My name is ....
20. I will have a chicken later in the day
21. Respect my folks.
22. I am a simple human
23. I want to stay in India
24. I love trekking..but havent ever dun it
25. .....
26. I love challenges
27. I am a topper
28. What do u like?
29. Love my parents , cant stay away from them.
30. Want to settle outside India
31......
32. .....
33. I cant speak english properly
34. I dont eat non-veg and am very religious
35. Smile
36. Wat do I call u?

........

The heroic atmosphere!!

I asked myself once as to what actually makes a "hero"? Why does one society throws up so many men of character while some societies seem never to get it right? Why do some societies ..cultures...races ..seem to throw up strong men while others churn out mediocore ones?

Getting caught up in the nurture versus nature debate was getting me into circles so I asked myself the classic socratic question..Define a hero?

What is a hero? Is he a superman or some ordinary man who rises upto the ocasion? Is he born a hero or is he moulded by his environments into becoming one? I guess ..neither.
A hero is defined by his surroundings and his society. And society defines hero by what it actually considers "heroic"! And THAT is the crux because every society defines a hero by its own standards . There are no absolute heroes..absolute heroism is a delusion.

A hero in US will and never be a Hero in India . Infact the same qualities which makes one a hero in one set of society is his weakness in the other.
The other counterintutive point about heroism in a society is the vast chasm between what the society thinks is heroic and what it says is heroic. This chasm isnt a deliberate one..this chasm almost defines a stagnant society from a vibrant one. A society makes its own heroes and heroes in turn make the society ..a fake society raises a fake hero who in turn raises a fake society...

The Delhiwalas

Barbaade gulistan karne ko ek hi ullu kaafi hai..
Har Shaakh pe ullu baithe hain..anjame gulistan kya hoga..

(one owl is the harbringer of destruction of the garden...with one owl sitting on everybranch of the garden..one wonders what will be the state of the garden)


There are a very few guys from Delhi I knew before I joined Navy and I got to know a few after I joined the Navy. To tell the truth I found them extremely vulgar and loud. Infact I wondered why are they so? I mean was it just a coincindence or maybe Delhi has got something to do with it? I almost got an answer when I visited Delhi for the fourth time this winter. It WAS Delhi..no doubt , which accounted for the vulgar nature of its citizens. While I was almost pained to see that the Capital of our country was nothing more than a hilly billy village on steroids ...I started collating the common nature of this crappy city which it passed on to its citizens.

1. Never accept responsibility/defeat/blame- The ground rule of a traffic etiquette in Delhi is this "if u hit a car ...before you get out to survey the damage ..start blaming the other guy" . This centrel philosophy translates into the fact that "watever I did ..its not my fault". Perhaps this is a direct cultural passover from the large political mass that inhabit this space . One can never make a delhi citizen accept that he is wrong. A Delhite is NEVER wrong. So when two Delhites are at loggerheads this presents a problem..becos u see none of them is wrong ,and yet a mistake has been commited. So how does the Delhites go about delegating responsiblity..Simple. The man with least "jugad" loses. The outcome of this topsy turvy logis is that no Delhite ever tries to correct himself..he tries to get more "jugaad".

2. Meddle in everything - A delhite is the self appointed empty vessel of India. He knows about everything and anything he doesnt know about is noyt worth knowing. For example a truck owner is the self appointed messiah of not only his truck but also the unofficial advisor to Transport Minister and arranger of the "best" wedding in delhi. A delhite ..be it even a lowly labourer will take unnecessary interest in your love life and tell you baba ramdsevs latest tantric sex poses..its immaterial to him that you have been giving him dirty looks for the last half an hour. A delhite's way of showing love is trying to poke his nose into your personal affairs ..and then get hurt when you refuse him his this "basic " right.

3. Louder is better- A Delhite believes in "management by decibels". His way of going through life is to shout his enemies into submission. If he is right he shouts and if he is wrong he shouts louder. This works with non-delhites as they just oblige to keep him quiet..but heaven forbid when the opponent is another delhite . The shouting match spinsd out of control till one of them is killed by ilegal firearm.

4. Rules are made to be broken- A delhite sincerely believes that rules are minor inconvineinces that are a hurdle to daily living. So one will find Delhites breaking traffic rules(even when there is no need), dirtying airports , railway stations and roads. Somehow the guards are always missing from their place of duty , somehow no one seems to know any procedure and somehow there is tremendous lack of self discipline. The corollary to this ruke(that rules are made to be broken) is that the bigger jugaad you have the bigger rule you can break.

5. Superb Self delusion - Despite contrary feed back from the entire nation a delhite is sure that the rest of hindustan is just jealous of him because he has the widest roads, best eateries and T3 terminal. He seriously believes that its impossible for someone not to respect his "jugaad" and his connections. No wonder that outside delhi he is a terribly hated and lost character.


Apart from all this the typical delhite is a conglomeration of the worst of the Punjabi,Jat and U.P cultures. He doesnt have any cultural etiquettes or roots. His entire life is spent making life miserable for other Delhites who in turn do the same to him. His car is a mess of dents ..gifts which other delhites have given him(despite the "best roads"), his day is spent quarelling with his fellow Dehlites for every simple thing and his spare time is spent admiring his family pack pot belly and planning of spending(and dirtying) hill stations of India.

The best part is that when a Delhite comes out to the "rest of India" he is beaten ,bruised and slapped into getting out of his "delhi culture" ...A painful process which no doubt troubles him but is somehow quite therauputic to the rest of India . And then he starts missing Delhi ki Ga(a)liyaan ;)

Mountain cycling

When Life gives you a lemon - Make a lemonade.....!!

Mountain Cycling is something I had heard of and in the finest traditions of my life..I decided that it was that time of year when one certainly makes an effort at insanity..! So I embarked on a 10 day /500 kms / 8 hrs a day ..trip on a cycle that costs as much as a scooterate...

What I describe below is somewat an official summary of things that followed...only for the fact that I do not forget it ...

Please bear with the official language ...

Day 1 (5 Jan 11) This day consisted of arrival of all participants. The base camp was at Kaudiyala. Mr Amit Bhatia from Great Northern Himalayas greeted the participants and welcomed them to the expedition. The team was briefed as to the camp rules and etiquettes. Post a simple but nutritious lunch the team enjoyed the serene Ganga beach scenery and had a game of volleyball to refresh themselves. A campfire was held in the evening where a round of informal chit chat bonded the team as a unit before the start of the expedition.

Day 2 (6 Jan 11) This was the first day of m/cycling expedition and consisted of introduction to the specialist CANNONDALE/HERCULES mountain Bikes. The team was introduced to these bikes by Mr Ramesh Rawat. He brought out the specifics of a mountain bike into the fore and pointed out the various subtle differences and qualities of gears and other features with “road bikes”. He emphasized on use of special helmets and apparels while riding terrains so as to minimise risks to self and others . The team used the bikes provided to get a hands on feeling. The team also cycled a 8 km stretch near Kaudiyala base camp to familiarize themselves with the bikes. A few minor hitches and problems were solved en route. Evening consisted of volleyball and campfire.

Day3 (7^th Jan 11) This day consisted of a cycling trek from Laxman Jhulla to Chilla. The team followed Mr Ramesh towards Chilla (approx 40kms) and back. A detour was taken towards Rajaji National Park to acquaint the team with rough mountain tracks. This detour ended with the temple of Vindhyavasiini. Lunch was served at the base of the temple at 1600 hrs. Post lunch the team loaded the cycles onto the truck and returned to base camp.

Day 4 (8^th Jan 11) The start of the main expedition took place on this day. Hands were called at 0630 hrs and post a quick breakfast and kit up the team left by vehichle towards Laxmanjhula. The team members carried packed lunch and two bottles of juice /clean water. A final checks for helmets and clothings were carried out. As we went to the base of the start the team was presented with new AVALANCHE cycles which were brand new. It was exciting for the team but then a few minor hitches were there as they were brand new and had to be fine-tuned.

The first day had a 40 Km tough climb and some few teething problems were expected. Enroute the team reached a village called Bijni where a break was taken as few members were quite exhausted. Nitesh Sharma had developed dehydration symptoms hence the Oic took a decision that he should rest and travel in the support vehicle. The climb was daunting post Bijni however the morale of the team did not let down and continued cycling towards the base camp at DEVIKHAL. However by 1630 hrs light was fading and it was not considered safe to ride post loss of light. A decision was taken to stop at 1630 hrs and pick up by the support vehicle was arranged for others who had yet not reached the base camp. By 1700 hrs the camp was put up at Devikhal and the team had a well deserved rest.

Day 5 (9^th Jan 11) The second day we started towards Vyasghat. At Shilogi the group was interviewed by the local news paper Dainik Jagran they also took group photos.

1115hrs- Ehrausain-dist-29km-we stopped for lunch and interacted with friendly locals.

1400hrs- Gumkhal-dist-40km-this is the place where down slope of 20 km started.

1500hrs- Satpauli-dist-60km-we reached this town quickly as there was totally down hill.

1610hrs- Bilkhet-dist-70km-the ride to this small vilage was comfortable as the terrain was flat and the surrounding was beautiful.

1700hrs Vyasghat-dist-84kms-the entire team reached the campsite near the bank of river Ganga and thus successfully completed the 2^nd day of the expedition.

Day 6^th, (10 Jan 11) Having spent 5 days in the course our bodies were already used to the cold, sudden jerks and the speeding downhill thrills. Today was the 6^th day and we were yearning for more. The routine was as follows.

0700hrs- hands call

0800hrs- hands to breakfast

0900hrs- the team departs from Vyasghat camp. The route began with gradual up and provided a perfect warm-up for the day. Then we faced a real rocky terrain with various landslides enroute and many waterfalls. The team stopped at various scenic places for photography and to take refreshments.

1215hrs- we took a stop at umraos,a small village for tea and lunch. At another 03km of flat terrain we reached Saud, from where we took mettaled road at another 04kms we reached Devpryag.

1300hrs- the team reached till Devprayag where we could see the meeting of rivers Alknanda and Bhagirathi.

1315hrs- the team departed for Kandi. we had a long stretch of uphill cycling with elevation up to 25 degrees and climbed as much as 1000mts for today.

1630 hrs- the team reached Hindolakhal; where today’s expedition stopped due to dim light and dangerous terrain.

1800hrs- after boarding the transport we arrived at Anjanisain, our destination at 1400mtrs, the highest we have encountered till now.

Day 7, (11^th Jan 11) The routine of the day was as follows:

0700 hours - Hands Call

0800 hours - Breakfast

0900 hours - We started from Ajanisain and we crossed the market area around 0930 hours.

1000 hours- we crossed Lamidhar in Tehri Garhwal

1030 hours- we took a little bit of rest and had some snacks and tea. Then we reached Jakridhar.

1115 hours- we reached Chauriyadhar School and took pictures of beautiful school kids.

1235 hours- Tipri Dam was beautiful and we took lots of group photos.

1445 hours - we reached Bhagirathipuram where we had our lunch.

1515 hours - we crossed Koti which is a small town of Tehri Garhwal.

1645 hours - Due to low light expedition was stopped and participants were picked up in the bus. We stayed the night at Hotel Siddharth Residency.

Day 8 (12^th Jan 11) The routine of the day was as follows:

0700 hours - Hands Call

0800 hours - Breakfast

0900 hours - Aniket Kumar, Sea I had to quit due to some unfortunate family problem. However the team started on time

1000 hours - We started our journey from the hotel at Chamba. The roads were mostly tarmac but not exactly flat but a gradual ascent.

1130 hours - We reached Chaurikhal where we filled our empty water bottles to keep ourselves hydrated.

1300 hours - We reached Tangadhar where we saw thin layers of snow. Few riders took lunch in that beautiful place.

1430 hours - This was the time when our team riders were escorted by thick snow clad roads and mountains. Dhanaulti which is very famous for its panoramic views and snow covered mountains. Riding on the snow covered roads were exciting. Few riders met with mild accidents but they were safe and not at all hurt. Slippery snowy roads made us more cautious. But off course keeping the bike on the side of the road and throwing snow balls towards each other was really priceless.

1500 hours - we crossed the famous Eco- Park of Dhanaulti.

1530 hours - We saw the bifurcation of Mussorie and Thatyur and as per our expedition route we took Thatyur route

1615 hours - The curvy downhill of Thatyur started. It was very easy to reach 45 kmph without even pedaling. The sharp hairpin bends made us feel the Adrenalin Rush. While downhilling the temperature and the wind was making us shiver. But somehow everybody reached the hotel safely and stayed overnight.

. Day 9 (13^th Jan 11) The routine of the day was as follows:

0700 hours - Hands Call

0800 hours - Breakfast

0900 hours - Day starts with steep climb. All of us are not so happy because of the climb that we have to cover from the starting of the journey. But with new energy and josh we started our day. As, time passed our speed increased.

1330hours - We reached at Garkhet where we take a short tea break and now the roads were mostly flat and down. Our bikes picked up the speed gradually. But the down hill roads were in a bad condition. They were rocky and in many places rocks fall down on the roads but still we moved safely.

1430 hours - We reached at Yamuna Bridge

1530 hours - Camping at the camp site. The site very close to the hill and Yamuna river. Small children were playing cricket at the camp site which was great.

Day 10 (14^th Jan 11) The next day due to bad weather, landslides and roads the plan was amended by the organizers and cycling was cancelled . We moved towards Chakrata on the support vehicle. We reached Chakrata in the afternoon and stayed at a hotel. At night the team got together and shared experiences about the trip.

Day 11 (15^th Jan 11) Although the team was supposed to cycle from Chakratha towards Dakpathar, due to heavy snowing the plan was cancelled and the team moved by vehicle towards Dehradun where the expedition ended safely.

With our respective bums having strangely converted into kevlar ..;)